Detox Diary # 1

     . . .Incredibly lonely. Open and honest communication with family members, intimate friendships, and even mutually beneficial romantic relationships are almost foreign concepts to me. It’s been that way for the vast majority of my life. I often find myself wondering how it feels to be a part of a group/family.
I’ve come to accept this state of affairs, but I’m not happy about it. And I’ve gotten used to feeling like there’s an important piece of my life that is missing. I find ways to compensate, but that sensation of longing and emptiness never fully goes away.
There’s also a very specific fear that constantly lingers on the fringes of my thoughts: that if people knew just how outside the “norm” I really am, then they’d just dump me in favor of people who are more mainstream. Goodness knows that’s happened often enough. I’m also deeply afraid that I’m probably . . .

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